My husband and son couldn't see me. They were joyously riding, taking in the trees and the fresh air.
I was wobbling, putting my feet down, as the tears were streaming down my face.
"Let's take you down our favourite path, Mom. You can do it, Mom."
This was the first day I rode a bike that takes you somewhere. My Peloton takes me somewhere, but it's a bike that doesn't move.
I missed the "how to ride a bike" memo as a kid. I don't really remember why.
Did my parents not buy me a bike? Did I not want one?
I have memories of my brother riding his BMX bike and Skateboard, but for me, it was playing basketball at the park and working as a lifeguard.
Bike riding in adulthood is a challenge.
Yes, I stayed upright, Yes, I was able to go in a circle in our court, but ready for a trail?
I didn't want to be left behind. I didn't want to be the downer. I saw the joy in my son's eyes and said OK.
"Show me your special route."
There were roots, stumps, a forest path, a bridge, rocks, and a whole lot of people that I had to navigate around.
And I was holding on for dear life. I had to stop every 5 seconds as I wasn't stable enough to control the bike.
My husband and son had a totally different experience. Joy and ease. For me, fear and frustration.
It was a bit like entrepreneurship.
How many times do we step into the unknown and blindly trust?
How many times do we not want to let someone down, so we do things we shouldn't?
How many times do we fail to communicate our wants, needs, wishes?
These were by far the first three traps I fell into when I started my entrepreneurial journey.
And it led to resentment, comparison-itis, and imposter syndrome.
The ride can be so much sweeter. Here's how.
1. Do your research.
Before I invest in a mentor or program or say yes to an online summit or speaking gig, I ask a lot of questions about the experience. Things like, "Who will be in the room with me? How will this grow my mission? What's the ripple effect? How do you work, play, parent, live? Who can I talk to about their experience?" Perhaps if I asked more about the path, I could have made a better decision.
2. Don't betray yourself.
The only person that has to love your content is YOU. When we start trying to please others, or say what we THINK we should say, we actually silence our true wisdom. Authenticity is sexy. There is nothing to prove. Own where you are and be proud of that.
3. Communication is KING.
The quicker that I learned to set a boundary, the more I recognized my worth. I stopped giving discounts. I stopped working on other expectations and deadlines. I started taking control of my schedule, my bank account, my mindset.
My husband and I also had to learn how to have a working relationship in addition to our marriage and parenting. There could be no "assuming" or stories running. As soon as something felt "off" with our business or with a client, we opened a discussion and got back in harmony. Don't let fear and stories rule the roost.
One thing I know, especially in 2020, owning a business can feel empowering, humiliating, hilarious, and freeing all at the same time.
For me, it's worth the ride. I'd rather get to the end of my life knowing I gave all I could, than live with regret of the "coulda, shoulda, wouldas."
How about you?
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Is now the time to master your story, self talk, and business strategy.
I have 3 spots left for 1:1 coaching in 2020.
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